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The Plague of Perfectionism

 

Several Tuesday mornings ago, following a restless night, I woke late to face an overfull day. I got up, poured my cup of coffee, then climbed back into bed and reached for my phone with the intent of opening my Bible app. But instead, I opened my email app. I’m groggy, I reasoned. I’d glance at emails as I sipped my coffee, then greet Jesus when I was fully awake.

The first email I read alerted me to a problem. Had I done something wrong? My shoulders tightened.

Then a typo glared at me from the subject line of an email I’d sent the day before. Hadn’t I checked that? My heart rate increased. 

Several emails later, I’d discovered three more errors in something I’d sent out.

What is wrong with me? Why can’t I ever get things right? Lord, I’m so sorry.

Sorry for what? The gentle question rose in my spirit like a breeze.

I’m sorry I chose email over time with you. But even as I offered the thought to God in prayer, I knew that wasn’t true.

I stilled my mind and allowed the Spirit to search my heart.

I was sorry that my mistakes made me look bad. I was sorry that others might think less of me. 

I can’t do this writing thing anymore. I can’t put myself out there anymore. It’s too hard. Too humiliating. Too painful.

A dense fog descended over my spirit—its familiar presence acted as a gracious warning. The Spirit had unearthed the truth, and Jesus offered forgiveness. Would I accept?

Thank you, Lord. Again.

Perfectionism. It plagues me, especially as a writer.

As a visionary—a big-picture thinker—details escape me no matter how hard I work to wrangle the tiny tormentors, and that means I make mistakes. I am an optimist who thinks she can accomplish more than is reasonable, so I work fast, which also leads to mistakes. To top it off, I am also a perfectionist, though given my wiring and my human nature, I cannot attain perfection or anything close to it.

Daily, I fight a compulsion to reach for something I can never attain.

So, if this negative mindset plagues me, who am I to attempt to inspire or instruct others who are also plagued? I am an expert on the pitfalls of perfectionism.

If, as a writer, you struggle with perfectionism, you may recognize these pitfalls:

  • Perfectionism leads to procrastination. The fear of failure makes it hard to complete a project.
  • Perfectionism triggers paralysis. The extreme fear of failure makes it nearly impossible to begin a project.
  • Perfectionism squelches creativity. The negative thought process that accompanies perfectionism stymies the hope inherent in creating.

Those are just a few of the pitfalls that a perfectionistic writer faces. When that writer is also a Christian, perfectionism can create feelings of distance or separation from God. Perfectionists often attempt to earn God’s love by performing for God, and, of course, that performance ultimately fails.

Failure may lead to shame, and shame keeps us from freely approaching Jesus, who paid with His own life to set us free.

So, what’s the answer? How do we overcome what holds us back?

We embrace excellence and shun perfectionism.

While that may sound simple, it requires intentional work that may include self-reflection, the healing of wounds, professional help, and a continual surrender to God, who offers His strength through our weakness.

Overcoming perfectionism may also require recognition of its source—it comes from the father of lies. He tempts us to strive for that which we can never attain.

It is the enemy who leads us to procrastination, to paralysis. He is the one who wants to squelch our creativity and stymie words that reveal the glory of God.

But… The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:4–5.

How do we overcome perfectionism?

We pick up the weapons that demolish negative mindsets.

And then we offer readers our best, imperfect work.

 

Words For Writers

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How Will You Use Your Writers Voice?

 

Dear Writer,

How will you use your writer’s voice during this unprecedented time of global concern? Perhaps, like me, you’ve hesitated to add to the conversation—the din of information is nearly deafening. In fact, the MIT Review declared an “infodemic” at the onset of the coronavirus outbreak in February based on the onslaught of information and misinformation fueling panic world-wide. Why add words to an already saturated space?

Yet, as writers who are Christians, it isn’t information we’re offering, it’s hope. We have an opportunity to offer words of peace and comfort during anxious times. We offer words of truth. We offer words that make a difference in the hearts and souls of readers. 

Each of us has a perspective to share that is as unique to us as our DNA. None of us will experience this pandemic in exactly the same way. Therefore, one may write words that encourage a community to come together in love, as Maria Shriver did in her excellent article Our Collective Moment, while another will challenge others to die to self by isolating at home as a means of protecting others. Yet another will offer words that draw laughter, a diminishing commodity in times of fear and stress. Someone else will share a recipe that offers warmth and comfort.

As our country, our world, is practicing social distancing and isolating at home, writers who are Christians have an opportunity to create social media or blog posts, articles or books, that reflect Jesus to those who are lonely, afraid, or overwhelmed by the moment-by-moment changes taking place.

So, dear writer, how will you use your voice? What words will you offer? How will you love others with the gift God has given you?

Let’s make a difference with our words.

Ginny

Words For Writers

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Scrivener: Rewrite, reorder, rejoice.

Ready, Set…Pause?

Do you dream of publication? Do you yearn to see your name on the cover of a book? Do you long to have your words touch others?

Maybe you’ve already reached the milestone of publication and now you’re pressing toward new dreams: a multitude of followers, rave reviews, bestseller lists. Not because you’re chasing success, but because you long to impact readers with a message that’s moved you. Changed you.

Whether you’re at the starting block or already racing toward your goals, you’re likely focused on the finish line.

But what if the race is a marathon and you were expecting a sprint?

You’ve run and run and now your legs feel leaden and your lungs ache. It seems the end is nowhere in sight. Did you miss a marker? Are you off course?

Do you push forward?

Or do you quit?

Maybe, you simply pause…

Last week, after nearly thirty years of writing, publishing, and impact, while staring at yet another blank Word document, a long to-do list whirring in my mind, discouragement called my name. And I answered. For an hour or so, discouragement and a few of his unsavory friends—frustration, fear, and fatigue—worked hard to pull me off course.

Fortunately, I’ve run this race long enough to recognize when it’s time to slow my pace, or even pause.

So, what does it look like to pause on the course? Do you step off and enjoy a long weekend at a spa? If that’s an option for you, do it!

But for many of us, a pause may prove more mundane. After I walked away from my computer last week, my pause included organizing a shelf in my closet and unloading the dishwasher. The tasks gave me a sense of having finished something. A completed project, whatever it is, offers an emotional boost. More importantly, the tasks gave my mind space to roam, to remember, and ultimately to reboot.

Here are a few tips for when it’s your turn to pause on the course:

Let Your Mind Meander

Choose an activity that requires little focus, something rote. Let your mind wander. It’s often during those times when our best ideas present themselves, or the solution to a problem comes to us. How many times has a brilliant thought shown up while you were in the shower?

Pay Attention to Your Thoughts

While giving your mind space to wander is valuable, you must also pay attention to your thoughts and tune out those that accuse or condemn. They’re not helpful. Ever. Instead, listen for thoughts that inform the project you’ve walked away from, thoughts that offer new insight, and thoughts that encourage you.

Recall Your Reasons

In order to get back in the race, it’s helpful to rehearse, on occasion, your reason for entering in the first place. Recall your compelling why and let it motivate you. If you’ve created a mission statement, recite it. If you can’t recall or come up with a sound purpose to support the project you’ve walked away from, maybe it’s time to reevaluate.

If after you’ve taken some time away from your work you find you’re still stuck or struggling, call in your cheering section. We all need others who will cheer us on, those who know why we began running in the first place, those who will come alongside us and help us, if necessary, cross the finish line to “The End.”

Words For Writers

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What’s Your Why?

 

Why do you write?

Why do you put fingers to keyboard and pound out words?

Why do you push forward?

Most people who embark on a writing adventure discover writing is hard, sometimes excruciating, work. It’s work that requires much, including long periods of silence and isolation, or at least mental and focal separation. It’s work that is often accompanied by rejection, frustration, and discouragement.

For some, writing is also deep emotional work that requires holding thoughts and opinions to the light, sifting painful memories, and dredging for courage.

For others it is spiritual work that requires examining beliefs, trusting what isn’t visible, setting aside self for the benefit of others.

For many writers, myself included, it is all of the above and then some.

So, why do you write?

Recently, I joined a group setting out on a difficult emotional journey. At the onset of our exploration, one of the guides asked each of us to consider why we’d chosen to traverse the challenging terrain ahead. She exhorted us to do the work of mining for our compelling why.

She assured us we’d need to draw on our compelling why when the path got rocky, when fatigue set in, when we no longer cared about reaching our destination.

She assigned us the task of discovering our compelling why and then returning to our compelling why each time doubt, discouragement, or even apathy tempted.

I am still navigating that course rife with obstacles. When I grow weary, I slow my pace and pull out a crumpled, tear-stained sheet of notebook paper. The piece of paper where I scrawled my compelling why. And I remember…

As one of the guides on your writing journey, I assure you there are few things more thrilling or exhilarating than climbing the mountain of your writing goal and reaching the pinnacle of your dream.

But the journey is long and the obstacles are real.

So I encourage you, I urge you… Search until you find the beating heart of your reasoning. Find the why that will compel you through the valley of rejection, over the peak of publication, and back through the canyon of hard work.

Let your compelling why propel you forward.

What’s your why?

TIPS:

If you aren’t sure of your compelling why, set aside time to consider the question. Discuss it with those closest to you, offer the question as a prayer, then write your why and keep it accessible.

If you know your why, return to it often. Post it where it’s visible. Share it with others who will remind you why you’ve taken on the task of writing.

Words For Writers

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